Touched by an Angel

I'm titling this post as that because of this... It was the day before Thanksgiving. I was extremely stressed out as well as very aggravated about something. At that very moment I saw what I can best describe looking like a pen on fire in the air. No worries, I was later told it was a floater, never had one before. But at that moment, what went through my head? First, for a sudden moment I was scared, what the heck was I seeing? Second, I wasn't so much scared as I was in calm, the feeling overcame me that it could be an angel looking after me. That may sound weird to you but you know what, maybe it was. And even if it wasn't it's better to think it was an angel than my eyes are going or something worse. So an angel it was.

Since then, this has transpired...

A few weeks ago I decided to try something. It has been said by some MG patients that Manganese, the supplement, can act as Mestinon (our MG med) does. I took it and initially felt very weak. I thought maybe it is like Mestinon where too much can make you worse. Instead of taking it daily, I took it a little more than once a week. At the same time I was taking Mestinon in between but less and less.

About a week ago, I stopped Mestinon all together. Please if you are an MG patient reading this do not stop any meds without discussing it with your doctor and under his/her guidance. So for the first time in about a year and a half, I am not on any MG meds... unless you consider Manganese which is acting like Mestinon for me. I didn't tell anyone because it's not like I was any better and it's not like I'm off everything all together. And the only reason I'm not on any other MG med when I really should be is because my doctor is too scared to treat me with all the serious side effects I get.

Then the past couple days I've been having serious brain fog. I have had trouble making my coffee, almost threw a banana peel in the sink instead of the garbage, and who knows what else because I can't remember. My brain feels broken. This morning it continued but along with it came this HUGE surge of energy of some sort. I don't know what the heck was happening. Honestly what I wanted to do was run, just run run run! I had to be somewhat smart in what I did though because most likely it was a POTS adrenalin surge and with it would come a huge crash to follow.

Guess what I did? For the first time in a year and a half... I walked on a treadmill!!!! Now, it was only 10 minutes and in that 10 minutes I only walked just over 1/3 mile. But oh my goodness!!! It was amazing to do something "normal!" And then I forced myself to stop because I was monitoring my heart rate and it was at 160... which it's been even higher just standing but still that is not good and that is a sign to lay down (POTS). But what came along with this? Well the treadmill is in the basement, which meant I walked down and up the stairs also! Another thing I don't do often and haven't done regularly in about a year!

After, I still felt like I had energy but again I had to be smart so I rested. While resting came the crash. Now I'm not sure if the biggest crash hasn't arrived yet or if its not going to arrive, but it was more mild. My upper body is actually more exhausted than my lower body, but I gave a few punches to the punching bag while I was down there too so maybe that's why haha! My eyes are definitely out of focus, but that's nothing new. And oddly with the use and depletion of my energy, my brain fog seems to have improved slightly.

So what was this? What do all of these things transpiring over the past few weeks add up to? I don't know. I can be hopeful and think perhaps MG remission and now I "only" have to deal with POTS, but that's kind of unlikely due to the symptoms I still experience. Don't read into this the wrong way, I'm definitely still experiencing all of my symptoms, but maybe they are a little more mild, a little less frequent.

I don't know what any of this means, but maybe perhaps I really was touched by an angel... Perhaps God is answering my prayers.

and receive from him anything we ask, because we keep his commands and do what pleases him. 1 John 3:22