Double Standards

First- I guess I spoke too soon. Today is back to my "normal" MG weakness. Oh well, I got a taste of what real normal is like yesterday and it was nice. I hope it comes back soon.

Second- topic: Double Standards.

You will often hear/see people saying "I'm sooo sick!" or "I hate this cold I can't do anything!" or "The flu is the worst" or so on and so forth.... said by generally healthy people when sick. When this happens what do we do? We say "feel better!" or "hope you get well soon!" etc. We empathize with them and sometimes sympathize. Take it a step further if a generally healthy person lands in the hospital or needs surgery for say a broken elbow, what happens? We send them cards and flowers and care packages. We want them to get well! At the same time we allow them this time to take a break from life so to speak, to rest and recover. All that is fine and dandy, I don't think it should be done any other way. But...

Why is there a double standard?

What I mean is this. I am chronically sick, as are all of my MG and POTS friends, and many others with other illnesses such as Lupus, etc. Chronically sick means at mostly any given point in time we have one or more symptoms, typically ranging on many more symptoms. Every single second of every single hour of every single day we are fighting the battle of sickness. Maybe it's not a cough or a runny nose or throwing up. Maybe it's not how you picture or have experienced being "sick", but we are still sick. And it doesn't go away aside from those rare moments like yesterday, where it wasn't even gone but better, or if we have the chance of going into remission. Even then typically it is never gone, again only "better" and "better" doesn't at all mean "good". For example, myself, here is a condensed list of symptoms I experience for the most part every single day that you cannot see (and in no way inclusive of the many other symptoms that come and go a little less often):
muscle weakness
brain fog
dizziness
lightheaded/faint feeling
nausea
trouble focusing eyes
tachycardia (too high heart rate)
bradycardia (too low heart rate)
trouble breathing
ringing ears nonstop
pain
extreme fatigue/tiredness

And yet what do we with chronic illness most typically hear? "You look fine." "Haven't you found a job yet?" "Maybe you should just eat healthier." "It's just anxiety." "Geeze you're no fun anymore." "Canceling, again?" etc. etc.

What is happening here is those who are generally healthy and occasionally get sick are given a break and given sympathy and help while recovering... while those who are chronically sick are rarely given that break, sympathy or recovery time which is so very needed. Those who are generally healthy and get sick are expected to stay home from work... while those who are chronically sick are expected TO work. Those who are generally healthy and get sick are expected not to do laundry, cook or clean and let others help out... while those who are chronically sick are expected to do all the above and still go out with friends too. This is a complete double standard.

It is true that those who are generally healthy don't and can't understand what it's like to be chronically ill and can't picture it especially if they can't see it, but that doesn't mean it doesn't exist. That doesn't mean it's something to ignore. The whole point of my blog is awareness. If you are generally healthy, imagine when you get sick and how horrible you feel. Imagine that as every single day of your life... every single moment. It NEVER ends. Sounds tough doesn't it? It is. So please give us, the chonically ill, a break. Give us more credit. Stop judging us because we typically already do plenty more than we should be doing. Sometimes we even redefine what it means to be strong.

Your sickness means staying home from work, maybe maybe on a rare occasion a short trip to the hospital. Our sickness means frequent visits to the doctor and hospital, more blood draws than we can count, knowing names/medical terms of things that only the medical teams should know because we've been through it all, and that overdoing it, especially if we have MG, could literally mean the difference between a day laying in a bed or being rushed to the ER and put on a ventilator.

It's not fun to be sick, and it's nice to have support when we are... whether it's for a couple days, or for a lifetime.