Did that just happen?

Well, whoa, that was an eventful morning! I started the beta blockers this morning with breakfast, around 7:30 am.

Around 9:00 am I started feeling sick to my stomach, wheezing which I haven't done in years I think, and felt like I was going to pass out. I forced myself to eat more food even though I just ate breakfast- and the sick to the stomach feeling subsided and lightheadness got better. I took my blood pressure and for the first time ever the symbol appeared to indicate irregular heart beat. Uggh. I tuned into the DVR to try to take my mind off my meds and catch up on some shows.

At 10:30ish I couldn't focus any more. As I paced the room and talked 1000 words a minute, my mom asked if anything seems different. I thought she was referring to external like she felt an earthquake or something LOL (really though I did feel that one earthquake in southern IL that happened like 5 years ago). I looked around and kind of thought she was going crazy haha. She then asked how I was feeling like if I had more energy. Ohhh that's what she was referring to. I said yes my legs just want to go go go.

By around 11:00 probably my body was on full over drive. In a matter of hours I went from 0 to 60 or maybe even higher. I felt like I had 10 caffeine drinks and could run run run and talk talk talk... it was INSANE. But at the same time my mind was no where to be found. I was forgetting everything, even if I had JUST taken my pill or not, if I fed my fish, what I was just talking about. Everything. And my word recall and thought process had taken a nose dive too. I said if I was in school there was absolutely no way I could pass a test right now. Body 0 to 60. Brain A to F. I walked and talked and walked and talked and typed and looked around wondering what the heck I could do to use all this crazy energy that suddenly filled me.

I decided I would paint. So pulled out all my supplies, started to set them up, ate some lunch, and CRASH. Never got around to painting. I wouldn't say I'm back at 0 but probably about 15 making my way back to 0. That was the weirdest few hours I've ever experienced. And though it may sound fun, it was far from it.

In between all this, I talked to my doctor's nurse who talked to my doctor who said "start using my chart". He's funny. I try but the messages don't go through to me. Anyways, besides the point I guess I'm still a bit in talk mode. Well more importantly what he said was that it seems I'm having an adverse reaction due to being super sensitive to meds which we know. Goodness, think if he gave me full dose? No wonder I landed in the hospital so often before knowing this diagnosis. Getting off topic again, geeze. So he said take Zyrtec, which I already do, to bring things down a bit. Then asked if I'd be willing to stop taking the medication (I was thinking heck yes!) anddd try again on Thursday (aww darn it). Well I said I trust what he advises and I'd be willing to try. The nurse told me to take my blood pressure throughout the day and call back this afternoon to let her know how I am doing. How I report I am at that time may affect where we go from here... not sure how but we shall see.

I talked to other POTS patients who have been on beta blockers and no one reported this wired feeling from them or wheezing/breathing trouble but they did say they felt off for up to 2 weeks starting it and that they got sick from it. The wheezing/breathing may be related to my having allergies or the MG... there is a caution for people taking this who have allergies or asthma and we already know what it can do with MG. And my muscle weakness has now hit since I spent the morning on overdrive.

Could part of that be what "normal" feels like? I can't even remember it but I do know I was always on the go doing something, or many somethings all at once. Now I am happy if I fit in a couple "activities" a week. But could regulating my heart rate do that? Why was it so intense? Why did it only last a few hours and then crash? Couldn't it have spread out equally throughout the day? And why did my brain decide to go on vacation? The irregular heart beat and wheezing are of course concerning. Well, these are the joys of medication sensitivity.

Good news, I'm alive and feeling closer to what I know as "my normal" right now, and for a couple hours I felt what it would be like to drink 10 energy drinks all at once... never wanted to do that to begin with but hey, cross that off the list. Praise God for getting me through that craziness, and praying to God that if/when I try again Thursday I have a better/positive reaction to it.

Thank you for the prayers! I know that's what kept this at a better outcome than it could have been.