Explaining why

As I sit here weak and extremely fatigued, I find myself wanting to ask for prayer on facebook as usual, but not doing so. You see, through this illness and also in becoming a Christian, I have lost many relationships. People must get sick of me always asking for prayer or accommodations. They still don't understand how I can look fine but be so sick, or how I can do things almost normally but only for a very short time. And thus, they leave my life. And then those who do believe me, who do care, I know they are always praying for me. So I feel bad repeatedly asking. I feel like people will think I'm just complaining... one day about this, the next day about that, the next day back to this again. I mean people have got to be thinking how is that even possible? How can she have so many symptoms and how can those symptoms just come and go so quickly? Maybe people aren't thinking this but it's programmed into my head because of all the years I went undiagnosed that doctors said "it's just anxiety." It's not just anxiety. It's chronic horrible lyme disease.

That got me thinking of something I can explain here.

Lyme disease is mainly contracted by a tick bite (it can however happen in other ways also). Lyme can affect/harm any organ or system in the body. Brain, eyes, teeth, muscles, nerves, heart, lungs, joints, mood, etc.

Lyme disease is not the only infection the tick gives. There are multiple other infections a person can get which in general are called co-infections. This means even more problems.

Treatment for lyme and each co-infection is different. Treatment is long, could be life long, and very very taxing on the body. Medications are often rotated, each medication comes with side effects. When the medication works, most people "herx" which is symptoms getting much worse before getting any better.

So you have symptoms coming from lyme disease, one or more co-infections, medication side effects and herxing. Those symptoms can change month to month, day to day, even minute to minute. Symptoms can disappear at times or seemingly appear out of nowhere. Symptoms can get worse or get better. Over and over and over.

This isn't even mentioning if a person has other health problems in addition to lyme and co-infections such as Myasthenia Gravis, POTS, a blood clot disorder, immune deficiency, adrenal fatigue and a back problem. This also isn't mentioning "normal" sickness even healthy people get like sore throats, colds, flu, etc.

Combine all of that together and you have one serious mess of symptoms and sickness. This is why one day I will ask for prayer for my horrible abdominal symptoms, another day for my horrible joint pain, another day for my extreme weakness and fatigue, another day for my blurry vision, another day for my breathing problems. Many days more than one of those and many other symptoms.

I don't like having these problems. I don't like that people doubt me because I "look fine." I don't like that this illness makes me have to keep air circulating to breathe easier, AC at a lower temp because I am intolerant to heat, that I can't go outside if it's too hot or humid, that I can't carry my own laundry downstairs, that I can't go shopping at a mall all day, that I have to eat certain foods or I will flare badly. I don't like being a burden on others. I don't like asking for help. I don't like any of it, but it's what I have to deal with. It's what all of us with this have to deal with. And we really need and want awareness. That is why I keep speaking up about it and hoping someone out there is learning.

So like I mentioned in the beginning, I am very weak and fatigued today. It may be from a new medication I just started for a co-infection as a side effect or as herxing. Or it could be my lyme and/or MG flaring up. Who knows. What I do know is God is my strength that gets me through it. So if you wouldn't mind once again keeping me in prayer for strength, energy and endurance, for total healing if it's God's will, I would once again appreciate it. Thank you very much. God bless.