Low Battery

In the past 2 weeks, I have done way more than my normal, and it's not because I'm "better."

Christmas Eve with the family
another get together with the family
having some visitors
going out to dinner
going to the mall
playing with children
cleaning/organizing
cooking
staying up later than usual

Sounds like normal life to probably most of you reading this. However, I greatly overextended myself, and now I am paying for it.

If my body was a battery, mine is always on low. I only have so much in me to use before I have to recharge aka rest/not do anything- a.n.y.t.h.i.n.g. This is why I have to rest even when I'm feeling I can do more. This is why I can't take on a job. This is why I need to schedule days of doing absolutely nothing in between days of doing something. This is why I can't over do it... overdo it usually includes cooking, cleaning, laundry, driving... normal stuff that my body just can't handle. The further that battery is drained, the longer and harder it takes and is to replenish it, so that I can function again.

So here I am, visiting someone in another state, laying in bed on the computer like I would be in my own home. That's because my battery is drained and I have nothing left in me to do anything. This is the second day of this and last night got scary. Last night I felt as if my body was shutting off. When I felt that before I landed in the hospital for 2 weeks. So please pray for God to restore my energy, my strength, my endurance... that my adrenals start functioning, my muscles can move without feeling like they are severely weighted down, that I can breathe easy, and that my mind is settled about all of it.

I may look completely normal on the outside, but the inside of me is fighting just to function. It's hard to understand but I just ask for your acceptance that it is what it is and I cannot change that. Please accept me for who I am and pray that God heals me. Thank you.