Constantly Under Attack

Last night I went to church. I tried to sit where I always try to sit in any church- the back end corner. I sat down only to have a lady tell me she needs to sit there. I wasn't about to argue with an older lady in church about why I needed to sit there just the same, so I moved a row up. Then, through the whole service I heard coughing and sneezing surrounding me. I haven't gotten to the point of feeling comfortable wearing a mask everywhere I go so instead I put my face in my sleeve for a few seconds when that happens. But I'd be sitting there with my face in my sleeve the entire time for as much as it happened last night.

The reason I try to sit in the back end corner is to avoid as many germs as possible, to avoid what happened last night. This morning I woke up with slight pain my throat and ear. Now I seem to be having some congestion. I'm not sure if it's related to the coughing and sneezing in church or not, but this is another reason why I have to avoid being surrounded by people and be very cautious when I am.

My getting sick isn't like when a healthy person gets sick. Getting sick makes MG and POTS flare up. That can land me in the hospital. As if that's not enough, if I were to need antibiotics, I have an even greater risk of landing in the hospital because of how so very many antibiotics are known to make MG worse. I have landed in the hospital from antibiotics before. And it took a long long time to "recover."

Your immune system protects you, normally. It fights all the bad stuff that surrounds you- the germs and invaders you encounter every day. Well, my immune system is deficient in fighting that. I don't have that protection healthy people have. So when the invaders come in, there isn't much to prevent them from harming me. Thus, the only thing I can do is prevent it by avoiding it.

On top of this not only is my body not fighting the bad stuff, but my body is fighting the good stuff, so to speak. That's what an auto immune disease means. My body is literally attacking my own body, every single second of every single day. The more I try to live normally, the more my own body tries to prevent that from happening. Specifically, my body is attacking the neuro-muscular junction, that signal from nerve to muscle. The more I use any specific muscle, or the more stress or a number of other factors, the more my body attacks. And the more it attacks the less my muscle works. My own body is trying to bring me down fast and hard.

How do you remedy that situation? Well that would be called a cure that doesn't yet exist. Or medication, which hasn't worked for me. Treatments, which are very dangerous for me because of my blood clot disorder. Immune suppressants- which I can't take because I'm already deficient in protection as mentioned above. It's just one big crazy mess. But that mess is my life and I'm trying to make the most of it.

So please, please please please, don't cough or sneeze out into the air or even in your hand. Do it in a kleenex or your sleeve. Wash your hands frequently. Don't go into public if you know you are contagious with anything as "simple" as a cold. By doing so you could very well be preventing me or someone else with chronic illness from landing in the hospital. And I will be very thankful for that.

I hope this helps everyone understand why I need to avoid so much, why I need to be cautious, why I need to rest so often, why I need accommodations and live a bit differently. It's not what I want, it's what I need, in order to keep on waking up each day and keep on going wherever life takes me. Thanks for reading!