I got baptized! (again but not again)

I was baptized as a baby. Though some believe that is true baptism, I believe babies can only be dedicated. Baptism has to happen by choice and full immersion into the water. It is a public declaration of faith- that you confess your sins, believe that Jesus died on the cross and rose again, accepting Him as your personal Lord and Savior. The only way to heaven. I made that choice over 3 years ago, and finally now made the choice to follow it with baptism. Here is my testimony. As you will see, I chose to do this now, right now, at a women's bible study. But I will be sharing this story at my church on Sunday and if anyone would like to be there, you are more than welcome to join me.

I believed in God, but I didn’t know God, and I didn’t know there was a difference. My life plan seemed to be falling into place… but then all my losses started.

I lost my job as the economy went under. Moving from Chicago to Texas, I lost contact with friends. We had apartment problems, car problems and problems finding new jobs. I kept saying ‘what next?’ claiming it couldn’t get any worse than this. Then, I lost my health.

I got pneumonia, twice, but never fully recovered. For two and a half years, I went from doctor to doctor, being prescribed over 40 medications, multiple ER visits and hospital stays, as everyone always concluded “It’s just anxiety.” And those famous words “but you look fine.”

Just when I thought there wasn’t anything left to lose, I lost what meant the most to me, my husband. He left on vacation as the man I knew, and returned a complete stranger to me. He became emotionally abusive and I suspected he was cheating on me.

One night as I was trying to figure everything out, I asked my husband “Why does Christmas mean so much to you if you no longer believe in God or Jesus?” One simple question that changed my life forever. The words he spoke cracked open my heart and created an emptiness that only God could fill. I spoke up for my faith, for Jesus suffering and dying on the cross just so we could be here. As I did, I felt this rush of light and energy from above burst through my soul and transform me. Days later, reading the Bible, Romans 10:9 gave me my answer: “If you confess with your mouth that ‘Jesus is Lord’, and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved.” And it was all in God’s perfect timing.

Now, just because God entered my life didn’t mean it got easier, but it did mean that it would be worth it. 2 Corinthians 12:9 states, “But He said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.”

Days after that, I sat in a doctor’s office alone as I heard my doctor say those words I will never forget. I finally got my diagnosis, a rare but serious neuro-muscular disease without a cure. That same day, my husband came home from work and told me he wanted a separation.

I came back to Chicago to stay with my parents and get a major surgery. The surgery resulted in a life threatening pulmonary embolism. While going through treatment for that, I got diagnosed with several more conditions. Then, just days before Christmas, I received divorce papers.

After the divorce came to a close, I felt my health was actually improving. But, I got bit by a tick and got lyme disease and an additional infection sending me right back down. It is so much more debilitating than the media and medical industry make it out to be. Every single day I battle dozens of invisible symptoms. There are days I feel like a prisoner trapped in my own body. But then I remember, what I actually am; I am free. In John 16:33 Jesus says, “In this world you will have trouble, but take heart! I have overcome the world.”

I had yet to be baptized as a believer first due to illness and barely being able to get to church, then due to not having a home church as I searched for one. But God used that time to continue to transform me. I finally was able to forgive my now ex-husband realizing that I myself am a sinner and I must forgive him so God will forgive me. It was then I became convicted that I needed to do this. However, I continued to struggle with the who and where for this to take place. As I battled these questions within myself I realized the battle we face is a spiritual one and the devil doesn’t want this. I realized I just need to do this and I need to do this now, period. I need to do this strictly out of obedience to God and to glorify Him.

As Paul says in Philippians chapter 4, “I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through Him who gives me strength.”